I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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