is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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