We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize