Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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