i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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