HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize