Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Come share oat with me in your robe
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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