he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize