did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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