Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
this hospital has no fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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