you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
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