you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
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I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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