butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Congratulations! We have a period
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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