..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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