My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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