just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize