What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize