I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
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vagina is talking i cant
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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