So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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