Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize