pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize