You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize