eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Randomize