DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Randomize