oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize