There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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