Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
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In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
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Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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