Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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