if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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