Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize