She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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