Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I have post one night stand depression
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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