i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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