Can i not drive my cunt home
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
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that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
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Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
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