i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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