We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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