bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize