All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
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You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
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And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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