Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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