all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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