It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
You can't motorboat a personality
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize