dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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