i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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