Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize