I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
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Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
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my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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