you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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