Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you definitely held a convo with a hobo

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  we have a secret handshake

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  (610): you definitely held a convo with a hobo (1-610): we have a secret handshake http://tfl.nu/i4o5
  Replies (25) Good night (4226) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.

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  (609): I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish. http://tfl.nu/0wzx
  Replies (45) Good night (6177) Bad night (813) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.

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  (319): I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone. http://tfl.nu/bot7
  Replies (9) Good night (3171) Bad night (504)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.

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  (813): God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket. http://tfl.nu/pclq
  Replies (13) Good night (5758) Bad night (941) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.

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  (256): I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources. http://tfl.nu/m7l9
  Replies (28) Good night (3637) Bad night (1253) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.

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  (901): I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas. http://tfl.nu/166i
  Replies (2) Good night (2439) Bad night (682) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?

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  (313): so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room? http://tfl.nu/p8ry
  Replies (6) Good night (770) Bad night (2700) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'

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  (217): I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem' http://tfl.nu/0jvg
  Replies (22) Good night (1748) Bad night (3227) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.

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  (832): Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something. http://tfl.nu/xkf6
  Replies (5) Good night (2012) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night

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  (614): Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night http://tfl.nu/qw5j
  Replies (3) Good night (634) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night

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  (505): She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night http://tfl.nu/ai6j
  Replies (12) Good night (409) Bad night (857) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.

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  (907): It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls. http://tfl.nu/6ztr
  Replies (2) Good night (281) Bad night (828) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.

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  (609): I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains. http://tfl.nu/mhck
  Replies (2) Good night (230) Bad night (678) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.

  (1-719): View more from Colorado

  Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!

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  (719): My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck. (1-719): Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER! http://tfl.nu/1zbw
  Replies (1) Good night (1380) Bad night (187) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me

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  (954): You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me http://tfl.nu/uohb
  Replies (2) Good night (549) Bad night (149)

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