I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize