They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
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I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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