So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
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This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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